How To Deal With Conflict In A Healthy Way
Whether you like it or not, every relationship has problems that must be dealt with. The key to maintaining a strong relationship is to manage the problems that arise in a healthy manner. Conflict cannot be ignored, you must face it eventually. And you might as well do it right!
But how, you may be wondering, do you have an argument and resolve conflict healthily? I am here to help answer your questions and give you some helpful tips as well.
Different types of conflict resolution
The first step you should take toward dealing with conflict in a healthy way is familiarizing yourself with the different types of conflict resolution. From there, you can decide which one you most identify with for the issue you may be facing.
The five types of conflict resolution are:
● Collaborating: Collaboration is a solution in which each side works together to be fully happy with the solution. This is an ideal situation for both.
● Competing: In this situation, both parties are trying to get what they want at the other person’s expense. Generally, it is a lose-lose situation.
● Avoiding: Side-stepping conflict is only advisable if it would be easier to deal with the issue at a later time. Otherwise, the root of the conflict will keep coming up until it is properly dealt with.
● Accommodating: This style is when one person self-sacrifices their wants to accommodate the other side’s wants. Although it may seem generous, it could also lead to resentment.
● Compromising: When compromising, both parties find a middle ground they are happy with. Neither will be fully satisfied with the solution, but it will be agreeable enough.
Taking the next steps
Once you have established which type of conflict resolution you will be implementing, you can start taking the steps to actually utilize your conflict resolution skills. When trying to handle conflict, you should follow the same general steps.
Think it over
In the heat of the moment, it may be easy to react explosively. Rather than immediately voicing your feelings and saying something you may regret, consider taking some time to cool down. Let the situation settle. This will give you time to think your thoughts over and express them in a clear and concise manner.
Focus on listening
One of the most important steps when settling the conflict is to focus on your listening skills. Try to listen to whoever you are speaking with the way you would like to be listened to. This way, you are showing that you truly care about what the other person has to say.
Your body language says almost as much as your verbal language does. When listening, be sure you are engaging the speaker through your unspoken actions. Maintain eye contact, make subtle, affirming hand gestures, and ask appropriate questions.
Try to understand or agree to disagree
When hearing out the other side of the argument, try to understand where they are coming from. If you cannot, perhaps it is best to simply agree to disagree, and leave it at that. An argument or simple conflict will not ruin your relationship if you both attempt to hear out the other side.
The important thing to keep in mind is that conflict is not the end of the world. Regardless of who you may be in an argument with, whether it is a romantic partner, friend, or family member, be sure to go through the previous steps with love in your heart.
As always, if you find that you need an outside hand, seeking professional help in the form of a counselor is always a great option. A counselor can help you to work on your conflict resolution skills as well as act as a mediator in an argument. Reach out to me for relationship counseling to help you improve your connections with other people.